After having two babies in twelve months, I found myself being a stay at home mom with two small children. My husband worked long hours in downtown Chicago, this meant it was me and the girls for usually over twelve hours a day. My social scene went quickly from a job that I enjoyed and other childless friends that could go out and about on a whim, to a mommy whose day consisted of diaper changing and breastfeeding. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change having had my girls for anything in the world. However, the sudden change in my lifestyle had some negative side effects.

I would say that I definitely had the “baby blues”. Two consecutive pregnancies will really put a toll on your hormones. I felt alone and it was becoming wintertime, which meant more isolation in the house. None of my other friends had children and we couldn't relate the same way we once had. I would consider myself to be a feminist, and my new role as stay at home mom made me feel like I had betrayed my gender. Last but not least, I had put on a lot of weight. When I looked in the mirror I felt down. I was up to a size 24. If I got any bigger I didn't know where I would buy clothes. My energy level was the pits. I was exhausted at the end of the day from taking care of the kids by myself. I knew I had to do something. I needed to spend at least a little bit of time taking care of me.

I decided to go see my doctor and see if the hospital had any diet and exercise programs for people who had as much weight to loose as I did. She basically told me that they didn't have anything like that but some of her patients had been successful with gastric bypass surgery. I felt disappointed and annoyed that she would even recommend that as an option. I went home and tried to think of a plan B. I had remembered my mom talking about a class called “New Face of Fitness”. I decided to drive down to the “Y” the next day and find out more information. I saw the bulletin board in the hallway and read about how many inches people had lost. I also saw the picture of Dee. The fact that she wasn't a size two made me feel like this might be a class I would feel comfortable in and be able to relate to the other members.

It's been seven months since I first came to class. I feel like I've become a new person physically and mentally in that time. I have more energy when I'm with my girls and I'm a much happier person. My husband has even noticed that I don't tend to get as upset at things as I used to. I've become comfortable with being a stay at home mom. In fact, I really enjoy it and consider myself lucky that I can spend so much time with my kids. I look in the mirror and I now see a size 14. I still feel like the same Jenny but I've learned to like myself more.
I would say that my confidence level has improved. I feel that people see me and not just my size. I would love to say that there is no discrimination in the world and that people treat you the same no matter how you look. Unfortunately, I've found that people especially those who don't know you, tend to make judgments based on your appearance. Sales people in stores tend to be friendlier to me now and ask me if I need help. Other moms with kids ask me to set up play dates and strangers are more likely to strike up conversations. In some ways our society finds it to be more socially acceptable to be a drug addict then overweight.
In the future I plan on doing more of the same. Going to classes and spending time exercising with a great group of people that I feel comfortable around. I've changed my diet and hope to continue to loose inches and hopefully tone up some areas.

If there is one single thing that keeps me going it's looking back at how I felt before and comparing it to how much happier I am now. Taking some time to take care of myself has not only had a positive effect on me, but all those around me. I hope I won't forget that.

Jenny P.
Aurora, YWCA

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